***Spoilers for Something Good***
Jason confronts Sammy (Deleted Scene #1)
The day after Sammy & Will Breakup (from the Part One timeline)
Jason
“Sammy! Open the fucking door!” I shouted as I pounded on the door for the third time. I’d come straight here after Will had left my house this morning. He’d spent the night last night, not ready to tell his mom what had happened, not ready to face the reality that his boyfriend had broken his heart. I was here to find out why.
I was about to knock a fourth time when the door finally opened. Sammy stood in the door frame, squinting at me. His curls were mashed down on one side, he had circles under his eyes, and he was still wearing the same Beastie Boys tee and baggy shorts he’d had on last night at the bonfire. He rubbed one eye absently as he stared at me without saying anything.
“Explain yourself.” My voice held a bite as I tried to keep my anger contained.
Wordlessly, he turned and walked back into the house leaving the door open behind him. I took that as invitation to follow, but pulled up short when I stepped into the completely empty living room. There wasn’t a single piece of furniture. No couch. No tv. Nothing.
Ignoring me completely, Sammy trudged into what I assumed was a bedroom. I followed, leaning on the doorframe as I watched him climb into bed and pull the covers up to his chin with his back to me.
It was three in the afternoon and the temperature in the house was warm, yet he was buried in blankets.
I’d expected to come over here and knock him on his ass for the way he’d broken my friend, but instead I’d found a guy who was clearly hurting. I’d never been a fan of Sammy, but I’d made an effort to be friendly because he was important to Will. Now, as I stood here in Sammy’s doorway, I felt most of my anger deflating, which was annoying. I wanted to yell at him. I wanted to make him feel like shit for what he’d done. I certainly didn’t want to feel any sort of sympathy.
I sighed heavily as I entered the room and sat on the bed across from his. “What the fuck happened?”
“I’m sure he already told you,” was the mumbled response.
“I want to hear it from you.”
“No, you don’t. You’re Will’s friend, not mine. Go be with him. I’m sure he needs you.” There was a hollow quality to his words. And an underlying current of pain.
“Who’s your friend? Who’s going to be here for you?”
“I don’t need anyone. Haven’t needed anyone for a long time.”
“Bullshit. Everyone needs someone.”
“Not me.” The words were quiet and were followed by a sniffle.
Shit. Was he crying?
Goddammit.
I moved over to sit on the lower half of his bed, near the bend in his legs, and rested my hand lightly on his knee. “Come on, Sammy. Tell me what happened.”
He rolled his shoulders so that he could look at me. His eyes were red-rimmed and he swiped at the moisture on his face. “What do you want me to say, Jason? I took his virginity then broke his fucking heart.”
I winced at the bluntness of his statement, but I chose to focus on the second part. “Looks like his heart isn’t the only one breaking.”
He shrugged as more tears fell.
“You loved him, didn’t you?”
Another shrug. Another tear.
“Then why? Why’d you do it?”
He didn’t deny it or try to deflect the blame. “He wanted to stay. To give up Purdue and everything he’s worked for. I couldn’t let him do that. Not for me.”
I scrubbed my hand over my face. That was basically what Will had told me, but I’d thought there had been more to it than that. That Sammy had just been in it for a summer fling, had taken advantage of Will’s sweet nature, and then sent him packing, with the convenient excuse that it was because Will was leaving for school.
“He thinks you regret him.” He rolled back over, facing the wall so I couldn’t see his eyes. “Do you?”
Silence stretched between us, then came his whispered, “No.”
I didn’t know what to say. Sammy had clearly done what he’d done because he didn’t think he was worth staying here for. He’d rejected Will’s offer to stay, but he’d done it with good intentions. I’m not sure I wouldn’t have done the same if confronted with a similar declaration. I wouldn’t ever want someone to make that kind of sacrifice just for me.
The whole situation was fucked up.
“Look, Sammy, I’m sure you—”
“Just go, okay,” he all but shouted at me, his voice filled with anguish. “Just let me be alone.” He pulled his blanket up, covering almost all of his face, shutting me out. Unsure what else to say or do, I got up and walked out.
***
Will & Jason hang out (Deleted Scene #2)
Thanksgiving Break (from the Part One timeline)
Jason
It was just after mid-month when I found out Zach wasn’t coming home for Thanksgiving. It felt like the bottom dropped out from under me and I spent several days in a funk, which wasn’t like me. I was surprised at how much it bothered me. I supposed I hadn’t realized just how much I’d been looking forward to him coming home. At least I had Will’s visit to look forward to.
Purdue didn’t break for Thanksgiving until Wednesday and with him traveling that day and the holiday the next, I didn’t see him until Friday. He’d hinted at wanting to keep a low profile so as not to accidentally run into Sammy, so we made plans to watch the Huskers play Iowa at his house. I picked up a pizza from Valentino’s on the way over, figuring he probably missed the Nebraska staple.
Though I had seen pictures on social media, I wasn’t prepared for the sight that greeted me at the front door when I arrived. He’d lost weight, so much so that his Purdue hoodie was hanging on him and his jeans were baggy. His hair, usually kept neatly trimmed, was shaggy and hanging over his eyes. It looked like he’d at least shaved recently, though his eyes were hollow and lifeless. The corners of his mouth turned up in greeting, though I couldn’t qualify it as a smile.
“Hey! Thanks for coming over,” he said, opening the door wider so I could step through.
“No problem. I’m glad it worked out that we could meet up.”
He shut the door behind me, then lead the way toward the basement where we had typically watched TV or played video games when we’d hung out in the summer. He already had the TV on, the announcers chirping in the background, rattling off various stats about the players and the teams. I just hoped Nebraska played better this year than they had the last several.
We set the pizza on the coffee table, popping open the box, not bothering with plates. Will pulled out a slice and took a bite and I was glad to see him eating.
“Man, I haven’t had Val’s since August. Pizza in Indiana isn’t the same.”
I picked up my own slice and took a bite. Silence fell awkwardly around us as we ate. Though we’d gotten pretty close over the summer, we’d only exchanged a few texts since he’d left in August. The breakup with Sammy was clearly still affecting him, making it the elephant in the room.
“How are classes?” I finally settled on a question that seemed innocuous enough.
He shrugged. “They’re okay, I guess. So far, it’s mostly gen eds.” His eyes didn’t meet mine, making me wonder if there was more to the story. “What about you? How’s the EMT program going?”
“It’s really good,” I said around a mouthful of cheese and pepperoni. “I’ve done some ride-alongs with the AFD and next week I start a round of clinicals at the hospital in Brinkley.”
“Wow. That sounds really cool. When do you finish?”
“We finish coursework and clinicals in December and then I sit for the certification exam in January.”
He let out a heavy sigh. “Not gonna lie, being done with classes and ready to start work in January sounds amazing right now.”
“You said classes were okay, though? I’m sure you’ll be glad when they’re over, but you still want to do the construction thing, right?” I knew I was pushing, but he clearly wasn’t as ‘okay’ as he wanted me to believe.
He set his half-eaten slice back in the box, then leaned back against the back of the couch with his head tilted up toward the ceiling. “I’m struggling,” he said without looking at me. “I’ve barely been able to keep my head above water since I got to West Lafayette.”
He rolled his head to the side, making eye contact with me. He looked so damn lost, it nearly took my breath away. “I’m in danger of failing, J. I can’t eat. I can’t sleep. Unless I’m in class, and then I can’t keep my eyes open.” He turned his head back, eyes trained on the ceiling. “When I close my eyes at night, I see the look on Sammy’s face when he told me it was done. The way he closed himself off and walked away like I meant nothing. It’s been months and it feels like it was yesterday.”
“Do you need to take some time off? Come home and take a semester to regroup and then try again next fall?”
He squeezed his eyes shut and I watched as a tear escaped, sliding down his cheek to land on his hoodie. “Being back here, even just for a couple of days, is making it worse. Everything reminds me of him. I can’t escape it.” He swiped at his face, then opened his eyes and looked at me once again. “I think I just have to suck it up and deal. I spoke to my advisor and if I bust my ass and do well enough on my finals, I think I can keep most of my scholarships. I’m going to have to retake at least one class, though. My economics teacher wouldn’t let me take a delayed grade.”
“I’m sorry, man. I wish I could help.” It was awful, seeing him so miserable, this guy who’d been so full of light and optimism all summer.
“I know. I appreciate it.” He ran his hand through his hair a couple times and blew out a breath. “Let’s talk about something else. You said your classes were going well. What else have you been up to?”
We talked a little more about my classes and about my seasonal job at the orchard. The timing of that job had been perfect since I’d started ride-alongs right after Halloween. As much as I liked having a job, I was fortunate that I could live at home without the worry of working, allowing me the time needed to focus on the EMT program. I figured once I got hired, I’d take another six months or so to save up and then I’d maybe look for an apartment in town.
We moved on to other topics while we kept an eye on the football game, and by the time I left, Will seemed at least a little more like his old self. That wouldn’t stop me from worrying, though. I knew he’d been gone over Sammy, just as I’d known the fallout from the eventual breakup would be messy, but I hadn’t been prepared for just how deeply it would affect him. It was amazing how strong of a bond they’d formed in such a short amount of time. I supposed that being ACE meant I would avoid that kind of heartbreak.
Rather than relieved, though, that thought had me feeling sad. While I didn’t want to experience the pain of heartbreak, I did want to experience the love that went along with it. The companionship. The connection. The partnership. I wanted kids someday. A family like mine. Could I have that if I never felt attraction? What would that even look like?
***this ends abruptly because it originally flowed into the scene where Jason discovers he might have a thing for Zach while *ahem* in the shower***